WHY do creative types always seem to have such fragile egos? Of course, "fragile" is a relative term -- no one with truly thin-skin would ever choose the entertainment field as a career, given that on average one deals with much more rejection than acceptance. And let's not even get into the fact that most of it is PERSONAL, dealing with how one looks or sounds or acts...
So I like to think that I've toughened up over the years. I never think twice about the auditions I don't get, and even when I'm very excited about the possibility of a certain role or job, I keep my excitement tempered with the reality that there are lots of other people who are ALSO excited about the possibility, and only one of us will have cause to celebrate.
Anyway, then along come the P2P sites. For any non-VO people, these are Pay-to-Play sites -- you pay for your subscription, then you can set up a profile and receive invitations to audition for VO jobs. And for the same low, low price, on one of the sites, you can even receive "feedback" on your auditions -- meaning you can do well and receive a "Finalist" ranking, or do not so well and receive a "Won't Be Considered"... and several rankings in between. I get my share of "Considering" and "Finalist" rankings... and the occasional "Not Likely". Bleah. And these rankings (especially the bad ones) have a way of digging under your skin. It's like it's not enough that you didn't get the job -- they have to turn the knife a little as they're pulling it out.
So I sent in an audition that I felt well-suited for. I even asked Stuart what came to mind when he listened to it, and he responded "friendly and knowledgeable?" -- the EXACT wording on the directive, and no, he didn't read it beforehand. So I thought I nailed it. And you guessed it, I got a "Not Likely."
But the Universe knows that all things must balance out -- so the next day, an older audition of mine was opened and ranked, and I got "Finalist." And not only "Finalist", but "1st out of 46" other auditions, all by my lonesome. Which made me momentarily elated, enough to yell, "Take THAT, Not Likely!" to no one in particular.
I wish I could truly let feedback, positive and negative, just roll off my back. Yes, good feedback is a nice little ego-stroke, but it's not like it guarantees you the job. And one person's negative opinion has no bearing on what other jobs will come down the pipe.
But I suppose it's just part of the package of being in a career that depends on other people's opinions. "What is it that we're living for? Applause, applause..." Artists crave affirmation. Whether it's a standing ovation or a simple "Finalist" ranking.